In Which Sanosuke Sweatdrops
by Digibaka
Summary: Plotless, hopefully funny fic. Read the title. Pairings: SanoMegumi, AoshiMisao, KenshinKaoru
1. In which Yahiko is severely injured

A/N: This is my first fic on ff.net. I suppose you can flame me if you want…but…please refrain unless you can prove that you are able to write better. Kay? Um, on second thought….most people CAN write better…. I don't mind constructive criticism though…well….duh….maybe I should start the story now…-.-;;;;

Warning: Probable OOC ness…

Sshhh everyone, it's starting…

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It was a pleasant, quiet start to a day in Tokyo.

"YAHIKOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

Ok, maybe not so quiet…

"Oi, Busu! It's not my fault that –"

"NOT YOUR FAULT??!! AND WHAT DID YOU CALL ME?"

Former gangster Sanosuke Sagara sweatdropped as he watched two of his closest friends (although he would never admit it to them) beat on each other.

"Uh….jou-chan….maybe you shouldn't have hit Yahiko-chan that hard…"

Kaoru Kamiya looked up from a now unconscious Yahiko. "Why not?"

"Uh…" Sano sweatdropped some more.

"Sano? Kaoru? Why is Yahiko laying on the floor?"

Sano pushed the newest entrant to the conversation away. "Hey Kenshin! What's up? Uh, Yahiko and jou-chan were just…practicing a new meditative technique of Kamiya Kasshin Ryu….let's go and not bother them…"

"Oro…But….oooh…." Kenshin winced in realization. "Well, Kaoru. It was nice to see you, that it was. We'll just be going now…"

And with that, Sanosuke and Kenshin slipped away before Kaoru could protest.

Once outside, Sanosuke sighed with relief. "Geez Kenshin. One would think you wouldn't be afraid of Kaoru anymore, as she's KINDA YOUR WIFE NOW…"

"And she's also pregnant…"

"….Good point."

"So what did Yahiko do anyway?"

"He- "

And then, out of nowhere, came a blinding attack that even the former Battousai  could not prepare himself for.

"HIMURA!!"

"Oro?"

A bluish purple blur launched itself onto Kenshin.

"I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU IN FOREVER!! I CAN'T BELIEVE KAORU'S PREGNANT! OH MY GOD!!"

"Orororororororororo……"

More sweatdrops from Sanosuke. "It's nice to see you too, itachi. Didn't know you were visiting…"

"DON'T CALL ME ITACHI!!"

Sano inched away from the over exuberant ninja girl towards the presence he knew would be ever lurking closely by her.

"How goes it, Ice man?"

Aoshi glanced frostily at him.

"What, pissed that it's not a yes or no question?"

"…"

"….Right."

Sanosuke settled on watching Misao proceed to pound more questions into the ever oro-ing Kenshin. He reflected that although Kenshin was (theoretically) a willing participant in this pounding, it was not that much unlike Kaoru's earlier pounding of a certain wannabe sword-master.

"Hey, Shinomori?"

"Aa?"

"Hey, you got your yes or no question!"

"…"

"Right…so, you ever get that feeling that you're the only sane one around?"

Aoshi turned to face the former gangster with a raised eyebrow.

Sanosuke sweatdropped some more just for good measure. "…Oookay then…"

"Oh my god! Misao?"

"Kaoru? YOU'RE PREGNANT!!"

At this point, Sano decided that he was all sweatdropped out. So he did the most reasonable thing he could at that point.

"Hey, guys? Seeing as you don't need me here, I'm gonna be going over to see the kitsune."

He was completely ignored. Kaoru and Misao complimented each other on…girl stuff…he never understood it in the first place…Kenshin was trying to slip off, and Aoshi was…meditating? Already? Shaking his head, he took his chance and slipped quietly off in the direction of Dr. Genzai's clinic.

END OF CHAPTER 1

Will Sanosuke escape? 

Does going to talk to Megumi count as escaping? 

Why is he escaping to Megumi in the first place?

What exactly DID Yahiko do?

Do you know the answers to these questions? Good, because I don't.

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A/N: That was some really bad, plotless crap. Hopefully, it was a little bit funny, and I can add some romance and *GASP* maybe a plot…but we can't hope for TOO much…Sorry if it seems like I bashed some characters. I didn't mean too. Kaoru, Misao, and Yahiko are some of my favorite RK characters. But I assume that in Sano's point of view, he thinks about what freaks they are occasionally.

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW!!

Push the little button! You know you wanna!


	2. In which Sanosuke meets his subconscious

A/N: ….Good god…I read the first chapter over…and it SUCKED!!! Lol…You people are gonna have to suffer through a LOT of crappy writing before I get it right.

Disclaimer:  Ok, ok. I forgot this last time. Poot on you. I do not, have not, and will not Rurouni Kenshin or anything else I mention in this piece of FANfiction. Rurouni Kenshin belongs to Watsuki-sama, who just happens NOT to be me. All I have is my Hoobastank (which does not belong to me) CD. Now leave me alone.

Just to let you know, words inside mean that Sano is talking to himself. Words inside // mean that Sano is talking to the little voice in his head. -.-;;;;…

Warning: Really stupid, plotless, crap. Oh, and swearing. It wasn't my fault!! Sano made me!

And now….REVIEW REPLIES!! (YAY!!):

**Astarte Katz: **Yes, sweatdropping is fun. That and facefaulting….Hmm, I'll try to answer the questions, even though I'm not sure I ever intended to answer them.

**Zhane323: **Umm…so you think my story is "Ok, you guess"…thanks…I think…?? I'm confused. Sorry I didn't update sooner, but I was under watch by parents who think that if I don't study for SAT's, I'm gonna die.

**Unique-starfish: **Yay! The oh so great unique-starfish sama has reviewed my story! ^__^! Yeah, I'm a new writer…I've been reviewing people for a while, but this is my first fic.

3 WHOLE REVIEWS!! WHOA!! That's better than I expected…

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When we left, Sanosuke was subtly escaping from the wrath of Kaoru and Misao….leaving Kenshin, Aoshi, and the unconscious Yahiko to take it for him…but we won't mention that….

Sanosuke peeked back in his oh so subtle manner toward the dojo. Phew, no one noticed me….

And then…

"TORI-ATAMA!!! (A/N: Rooster head…Don't feel like doing Japanese translation guide…)"

"Eh…Sorry, can't hear you!"

And with that, Sanosuke Sagara took off at a dead run towards Dr. Gensai's clinic.

                                                                                    *                      *                      *

Dr. Megumi Takani sighed and stepped back from bandaging her young patient. "There, you should be okay now. Just try not to play with your okaa-san's knives anymore…"

The young child peered back up at her and giggled. "O-tay!!"

Megumi sweatdropped. And then…

"KUSO!!" (A/N: Damn…)

Megumi watched, twitching angrily, as a tall man with spiky brown hair resembling a rooster untangled himself from where he had managed to crash into her bandage store.

"Tori…."

"Eh…hehe…Hey, Kitsune…"

"Hello, tori."

"AAHHHHHHHHH!!!"

                                                                                    *                      *                      *

Misao looked up from glomping Kaoru. "Hey, did you hear something?"

"Yeah…wonder what it was…"

Kenshin winced. "I feel very sorry for Sano, that I do. Ne, Aoshi san?

"…"

"Ok…*sweatdrop*…"

*                      *                      *

"Oww…goddamn it, Kitsune! I didn't mean to!"

"Tell it to someone who cares!" Megumi gave another vicious bash to the former gangster with her medical bag. "You-*bash*-messed up-*bash*-my bandages-*bash*-right after-*bash*-I ORGANIZED THEM!! AND YOU MANAGED TO BREAK HALF MY MEDICINAL BOTTLES IN THE PROCESS!!!"

"OOOOOOWW!!! I'M SORRY!!"

Suddenly, Megumi paused. And then…

"BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"

Sanosuke…sweatdropped. "Mind telling me what's so funny, Kitsune?"

"Hmph. Some tough guy you are. Getting beat up by a lady and her bag."

"Yeah…I don't see any ladies…" he muttered under his breath. 

"What was that?"

"Nothing…"

There was an awkward silence. Both were completely unused to the concept of having a conversation in which neither was assaulting the other verbally, or in Megumi's case, physically.

"Yeah…you might wanna come to the dojo…The itachi and the Ice pop are here visiting…And Yahiko's unconscious…and Kenshin probably will be soon." And then, Sanosuke realized what he said. OH SHIT!! We can't go back to the dojo! Jou-chan and the Itachi are gonna kill me! Ok, think Sano, think….

Megumi looked at Sano strangely. "Hey…you okay?"

Sano looked up and sweatdropped, realizing that he had been arguing with himself out loud.

"If you don't want to go back to the dojo, that's ok…"

Sano let out a sigh of relief.

Just then, the foxy doctor realized something. "Hey, tori. I understand that you wanted to escape the dojo…but why did you come here?"

Sanosuke froze. Oh, crap. Why the hell did I come here anyway?

                        /Face it, rooster. You like her./

                        Well, duh…we're friends, right?

                        /That was the corniest and least original response I have heard. Ever. You're pathetic./

                        Wha..? Hey! WHO ARE YOU?? AND WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HEAD??

                        /Hmph. That is so like you. Go and change the subject, why don't you./

                        JUST TELL ME WHO THE HELL YOU ARE!!

                        /Well…Sanosuke, I'm sorry it had to come to this, but…I am your father./

                        What?

/*Sigh*…never mind. Note to self- never make Star Wars jokes with Meiji Era idiots again. Yeah, anyway…you should know me. I…AM YOU!!/

Ok…

At this point, Megumi decided to break in. "Er…you never answered my question."

"Yeah…guess I had nowhere else to go…Ehehehehe…" Sano grinned stupidly and scratched his head.

"Yeah…" Something like a flash of disappointment passed over Megumi's face. But Sanosuke, being Sanosuke (not counting the little voice inside of his head), missed it. Entirely. 

More awkward silence. And more. (A/N: A sign that Digibaka has extreme writer's block)

"Em…maybe we should go back and check if the Ice block and Kenshin are alive anyway."

/GAH!! YOU IDIOT!!/

WHAT??

"Nothing?" Megumi looked confusedly at Sano.

"Eh?…Oops….did I say that out loud?"

*Sweatdrop* 

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A/N:  First of all, yes I know, we still don't know what Yahiko did. In fact, I have no clue. You're welcome to give me suggestions in your reviews (WHICH YOU WILL BE GIVING!!) Hmm…sorry for breaking it off there….but I have serious writer's block, and this is just a plotless fic that's kinda going nowhere. At this point, I'm guessing that any romance will be lighthearted and possibly only very un-subtle-y (is that a word?) hinted at because I'm too happy to do anything intense. I really shouldn't be happy, considering that this is the last day of winter break and I have to finish my Silk Road project in 2 hours. Oh well. It's all good. I seriously don't get teen angst. I'm happy! ^______________^ Except when I'm sad….-.-;;; AND THIS IS REALLY SHORT! GAH!! In any case:

REVIEW!!

REVIEW!!

REVIEW!!

COME ON PEOPLE! MY GOAL IS TO GET MORE THAN 3 THIS TIME!

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